What was once a life of endless hours of staring at my steering wheel in utter chaos has suddenly turned into utter monotony and episodes of American Idol with my mother. Both sound a little too unwelcomed to say the absolute least. However I am stuck once again in the whirlwind that is my indecisive nature and inability to choose which life I am more willing to take as my own. Don’t get me wrong, all day yesterday I seriously looked forward to the two hour Hollywood finale of American Idol… first gay woman contestant who is more than hot? I would say yes. But what was once doing acid in Delaware park with a great friend and glaring endlessly at the mind-blowing piece of art entitled Karma by Do Ho Suh has turned into day time Roseanne marathons and learning how to cook curry with my dad. Of course, during that specific acid trip we were swiftly trying to escape the force field put off by bike kid who followed us “unknowingly” with a pacifier and prayed in the bushes among our exit. It’s safe to say it wasn’t all art observing and pretty colors.
Anyways, is it abnormal to say I love both? Curry cooking is damn good and during anytime I took anything psychedelic I couldn’t get the thought of all the mother-daughter bonding I was missing and fighting the severe urge to call her crying. Often, I did. However, when I wake up in the morning with nothing to look forward to other than Friends reruns at 3 and strawberry lemon ice for dessert I wonder why my life has suddenly become so void of anything meaningful and life altering.
Maybe being in your twenties is all about doing crazy shit and then sitting down with your parents and eating entire tubs of ice cream while complaining that your life is going no where. I moved back down to Tampa for these times. I gave up the late night drives in my best friend’s truck with endless amounts of weed and nowhere to be for late night talks with my dad about the monstrosity of the universe while eating almonds until my mouth dries to its limit. I loved every minute of that conversation, and it will stick for quite some time.
I’m still not sure which entices me more… Adventure or normalcy. All that I know is for now I am climbing a mountain of that lemon ice, the ultimate boring guilty pleasure. And I will definitely admit I find guilty pleasure in the 9 to 5 commute with a secret joint rolled in your pocket. I kind of love it.
And one more thing… In case you haven’t seen possibly my favorite piece of artwork ever to be created, here it is.
Do Ho Suh
Albright Knox Art Gallery